


With Pennsylvania under me

by dobbythegoalie



Category: Men's Hockey RPF
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-10-06
Updated: 2020-10-06
Packaged: 2021-03-08 05:48:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,262
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26846917
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dobbythegoalie/pseuds/dobbythegoalie
Summary: Nolan decided right then, looking at TK’s huge smile, even if they break up in a week, all the pain and the anger and the self-hatred will be worth it for how happy he feels right now.
Relationships: Travis Konecny/Nolan Patrick
Comments: 4
Kudos: 35





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I took some liberties when it comes to where Nolan has lived in the past and maybe a couple of other things.

Nolan woke with a groan, rolling over to stare at the clock blaring the numbers 1:00 back at him. His parents were probably going to yell at him again, getting tired of him sleeping in every day now. He didn’t know what he was supposed to wake up for, he doesn’t have hockey anymore. 

Plagued by injuries and migraines Nolan had to finally call it quits just a few months before the NHL draft. He had been projected to go in the top two and quitting had taken everything from him. He’s from a hockey family, everything about his family revolves around hockey. There had never been any other path thought of for him, everyone just expected he would play. He wasn’t even sure who he really was without hockey. 

He wouldn’t say he’s depressed though his mom would disagree with him. He just doesn’t want to be stuck in a small town Manitoba with his hockey obsessed family and only a sister who knows his biggest secret. Nolan’s parents hadn’t been the most open growing up, opting for tight lip smiles and nods of praise rather than warm hugs and exclamations of love. They are extremely conservative for Canadians and his father is too wrapped in hockey culture. 

Growing up he was told being gay was wrong. He grew up hearing his father and uncles throw out slurs like they were nothing. He was always asked about whether he had a girl. Muscles and strength are a byproduct of hockey, but for Nolan it also helped him fit in to his family. He could look at the gay guys his parents threw disgusted looks at and think ‘I don’t look like them, I can’t be like them.’

Sometimes Nolan can’t help but wonder if his injuries weren’t the best thing that happened to him. The culture of hockey isn’t meant for people like him and hearing slurs nearly every day was going to break him eventually, more than quitting hockey did. Only Maddie knew he was gay, and he hadn’t even told her, she just happened to walk in on him kissing one of his old teammates. For years he’s told himself he’s not gay, it’s just buddies. Everyone thinks Ryan Gosling is hot, everyone feels nothing when they kiss girls. 

Nolan was starting to feel like there was two versions of him, who he really is and who he shows everyone. It was getting exhausted keeping secrets and not being able to be himself around his family. He hated himself for years, hated that part of himself. He thought it was going to keep hockey from him, in the end only he kept hockey from himself. There’s still a curl of anxiety in his stomach as he thinks about kissing guys, dating guys, but he hates himself a little less.  
In the end that was what finally pushed him to find a way out. Nolan sighed as he grabbed the laptop next to him, resigned to job searching for the rest of the day. At least it might get his parents off his back for some time. 

He didn’t quite know where to start when he opened the laptop. Googling ‘jobs’ was a little too broad he quickly found out. Nolan debated texting his mom to ask for some help, but he wanted to find something with no outside input. 

He paused for a second, weighing the pros and cons in his head. He didn’t know what he wanted to do, but he did know he wanted to get away.  
Nolan was lucky in one way, his father being a hockey player meant he had duel citizenship for Canada and USA. Thinking back at all the cities they’ve lived in as his father was traded, he couldn’t help but zero in on one in particular. Philadelphia, it’s where Nolan was born. He doesn’t remember much from their time there, but the photos of their time there show him at his happiest. 

With a nod to himself Nolan googles ‘jobs in Philadelphia’ and starts clicking through the listings. In another tab he pulls up apartments. He has a lot of money saved from living with billets and eating with the team in juniors. He’s pretty sure he has enough to survive at least a month without needing a job, even with moving costs. 

He quickly scrolls past any needing a college degree, eventually spotting a cashier job at a bakery. It pays a couple more dollars than minimum wage and he shrugs to himself before applying. He quickly applies to a few more cashier, retail, and gym trainer jobs before switching to apartments.  
Without really thinking about it he picks an apartment downtown, close to almost everything he applied to and sends in an application.  
It only takes a couple days and suddenly Nolan has a place to live and a new job and he’s packing to move to another country. His family took it well, his parents mostly just glad to not have him moping around anymore. 

Travis woke with a smile, rolling over to the red 9:30 blinking back at him. He had an hour until morning practice, and he rolled out of bed with a smile. He was happy to see he still had time for coffee while he walked Stanley, his Labrador puppy. Sometimes he got Lawson, his roommate and old buddy from juniors to do it but he wanted to start the day off with some sunshine and fresh air. 

“Stanley! Come on boy.” TK called as he grabbed the harness and leash. If they hurried, he’d have time to stop at his favorite bakery a couple of streets over on Greenwood. 

Travis laughed as Stanley came running at him, crashing into his legs. “Come on buddy.” 

The warmth of the sun brightened Travis’s mood even more, smiling up at the clouds as they walked down the street. There was a slight crispness to the air, signaling that winter was just around the corner. 

TK knew that most hockey players had winter as their favorite season. Winter brought hockey and he loved it for that, but there was something about the crispness in the air and the sunshine beating down that made fall his favorite. 

He couldn’t help but feel a swell of peace wash over him as they reached Essen Bakery, the white bricks, and big front windows a welcome sight in the bustling city around him. He loved Philadelphia, really, but there was something about the peacefulness that Essen brought. Inside was full of cozy armchairs and single tables. 

“What can I get you TK?” Travis’s favorite barista, Ruth, greeted him, an older lady with a smile that could brighten any bad morning. 

TK’s grin widened even further, “How are you pretty lady? Can I grab a large regular coffee and a treat for Stan here?” That was another reason this was his favorite bakery; they were one of the only ones that allowed him to bring Stanley in with him. 

“Right away hon. Total is $6.59.” 

Travis handed his card over and pulled a 20 from his wallet at the same time, dropping it in the tip jar as he grabbed his card and the receipt. He knew Ruth owned the place and they did well enough, but he made an insane amount of money and he liked to give it back to the city that has welcomed him. 

Whistling as he grabbed his coffee Travis fed Stanley his plain croissant and headed back out the door. A glance at his phone told him he had a half hour before he needed to leave for practice, a sign escaping him without thinking. 

TK loved hockey, he did, but some days it felt like it was the only thing in his life. Everyone else on the Flyers has a girlfriend or wife and while he doesn’t want exactly that he wants something. He wants someone to vent to and cuddle on the couch after a bad game. 

There’s a part of him that’s terrified of how the team would react. His family and close friends like Lawson all know he’s gay, but he’s never been brave enough to tell anyone on the team. He doesn’t think anyone on the team would be a dick, but just the thought makes him feel like there’s an empty pit in his stomach. He usually just does anonymous hookups and avoids dating but there’s something about the nearing winter that makes him want a partner. 

Travis enters his apartment with a sigh, the sound of his keys dropping on the holder immediately followed up by a “Did you get me anything?” from the living room.

As he takes off the dogs harness, he follows the voice into the room, spotting Law laying spread out on the couch. “You can get off your lazy ass and walk down yourself.” Travis responds, smirking at his roommate as he moves to grab his gear bag for practice. 

“I’ll see you later bro.” TK says as he heads back out the door, grabbing his keys again. 

As he’s walking down the hallway, he notices one of the doors propped open and some people carrying a bed towards one of the rooms. He makes a note to keep an eye out for new neighbors and quickly gets into the elevators, so he isn’t late for practice.


	2. Chapter 2

It was a gloomy day when Nolan was finally moving into his Philly apartment. ‘Figures’ he thinks to himself. He doesn’t have too much with him, just clothes and whatever he could pack into one suitcase. 

As he starts unpacking and taking stock of what he still needs to get, he eyes the hockey gear in the corner. He can’t decide if he regrets taking it with him. It’s not a pleasant reminder of his past life, but he couldn’t bring himself to leave it. It felt like he’d be leaving a piece of himself in Winnipeg. 

His stomach growling breaks through the silence in the almost entirely empty apartment, echoing around the room. He hadn’t eaten yet today, too focused on moving in and unpacking. 

“Fine.” He mumbles to himself, deciding to leave everything until tomorrow. At least he had the hindsight to order a bed and have his new landlord let the delivery guys in the day before he arrived in America. 

His bones creak as he drags himself off the floor, a sore reminder of how his body has failed him through the years. Nolan debates with himself for a second, he could just order from Uber Eats. But a voice in his head, sounding suspiciously like his sister, tells him he needs to get out and see his new city. 

He reluctantly grabs a hoodie and slips on his shoes, opening google maps to just search ‘food’ and decides to go to the closest place near him. 

As he’s locking the door to his apartment he’s almost knocked over. Just as he’s about to let out a loud ‘fuck!’ a voice calls out “Sorry man, he just snuck through the door.”

Nolan bites back a sigh, he hadn’t wanted to talk to anyone today, but he doesn’t really want to start off on the wrong foot with his neighbors. 

“It’s fine.” He replies. His sister likes to call his neutral face ‘bitchface’ and he can see his neighbor flinch a little in response. 

He can’t help letting a small smile come onto his face as he looks down at the cause of the interaction, at his feet is a small black Labrador who looks up with the happiness only a puppy can have.

Nolan reaches down to give him a pat as his neighbor speaks again. “His name is Stanley.” Nolan just grunts in reply, still focusing on the dog who is trying to lick every part of Nolan he can reach. 

“And I’m Travis.” His neighbor tries again, a little bit of uncertainty creeping into his voice. 

“Nolan.”

“Oh, hey nice to meet you, are you new here?” Nolan can’t help but roll his eyes at the brightness in his neighbors voice. He should’ve just ordered on Uber. 

“Yupp.” He replies. “Look I was just going to grab food.” He says as he’s passing Travis, only sparing a quick glance at his neighbor. Nolan groans to himself, of course his new neighbor is cute and a professional hockey player. Of course, he is. 

“Uh, alright dude. Catch you later.” Nolan hears Travis call out behind him just as the elevators close. 

Leaning back against the elevator Nolan can’t help but let out a frustrated “Gah.” He moved here to get away from hockey, not to live right next to one of the Flyers. It doesn’t help that Travis is cute too, his shoulder length hair complimenting his dark eyes and bushy eyebrows well. Looks slightly like a racoon but Nolan isn’t too proud to admit his type is garbage. 

Nolan resigns himself to looking out his peephole every time he leaves his apartment now, hoping to avoid another run in with Travis. He quickly grabs some McDonalds from across the street and eats there to avoid his empty apartment. 

It’s just as echo-y as ever when he reenters. He’s going to have to get furniture tomorrow, but after his shift. Tomorrow he starts at the bakery a couple of streets over, a place called Essen. He had a phone interview with the lady who owns it, Ruth, and he can already tell he’s going to enjoy working with her. She came off as a no nonsense lady with a wicked sense of humor, cracking a couple of less than innocent jokes once she decided Nolan was up to the job.

Slowly Nolan gets ready for bed, putting some music on his phone to cut some of the silence that surrounds him. He has an early shift tomorrow; Ruth had decided that the best way to start was to jump on in with an early morning rush. Nolan couldn’t say he was looking forward to it, but it couldn’t be worse than getting boarded by someone 50 pounds heavier than you. At least, he thought, he might feel more welcome in this city than he does at home. There were a couple of rainbow flags in the windows of businesses around him and he likes how anonymous he feels surrounded by all the towering buildings.  


“Law! Law buddy!” Travis yells as he enters the apartment, dragging Stanley in behind him. “Dude I just met the hottest guy I’ve ever seen in my life.”

“Oh god.” Travis hears Law groan from the living room. 

“No, no dude. I swear he was the hottest person alive.”

Lawson shook his head. “I believe you TK, but you get a new crush every other week and then I have to deal with it when you get your heart broken because you weren’t willing to tell them.”

TK sighed, “Okay I know, but he’s our new neighbor I wouldn’t do anything anyways. He has the best bitchface though, it was like he hated me on sight.”

Lawson let out a loud laugh. “Only you would find someone hating you attractive.”

“Listen buddy, you don’t understand. He was so tall. Like so tall and so built. He was built like a goddamn fridge dude. And he has such a good flow, right down to his shoulders and he just looks like he hates everything around him. He’s so hot.” TK rushes out, plopping onto the couch next to Law with a sigh. 

Law rolled his eyes. “Alright bud, our new neighbor is like the second coming of Christ I get it.”

“Just wait until you see him, you’ll understand.”

“Uh huh sure TK." Law rolls his eyes, too used to his best friends antics. "Hey do you want to go to the bakery with me in the morning? I know you don’t have skate till the afternoon.” 

“Yeah alright.” 

The next day TK is still waxing poetically about the new neighbor and Lawson is just resignedly listening, looking forward to the coffee from Essens to help him deal with his best friend who even at 9 am is a bundle of energy. Law was just glad they left Stanley at the apartment, not awake enough to deal with two puppies.

“Oh shit.” Travis says, stopping just in the door of Essens.

“Dude what are you doing?” Law grumbles, pushing at his friends back to get him inside.

TK turns around, pushing Law back to try to go back outside. “No no dude, you don’t understand. That’s hot neighbor. Hot neighbor now works at Essens what the fuck what is he doing here?”

Law rolls his eyes, a common expression around Jt. “Dude he’s already glaring at you, I don’t think you can avoid this. And, I want coffee.” 

“Fine.” TK grumbles, turning around with a blush. He sees that Law was right, Nolan is at the counter just glaring straight through him. Travis shouldn’t find it as attractive as he does. 

“Uh hey buddy, nice to see you again.” TK stammers out as he approaches the counter, only getting a grunt from Nolan in reply. 

“He’ll take a regular coffee and I’ll take a mocha latte.” Law cuts in, elbowing TK to stop being a weirdo. 

Travis watches as Nolan rings them up, handing over his card and dropping his usual 20 dollar bill in the tip jar. He’s elated to see a slight red tinge to Nolan’s cheeks when he looks up. It’s gone as quick as it came, but TK revels in the fact that he brought it out. 

“So, did you just move to Philly?” He asks as he moves with along the counter as Nolan goes making the drinks.

A grunt of yupp is all he gets in return but TK considers it progress. 

“Are you Canadian? I thought I heard a little bit of an accent, eh?” He tries again, adding a little laugh to the end of his sentence. 

“Yupp.” Is the grunted reply once again. Okay TK thinks, time to rethink. 

“So, do you like hockey?” Travis immediately regrets the question, watching as Nolan’s hands grip the coffee pot he’s holding a little harder, a more furious blush spreading across his cheeks. 

“No.” Is the forceful reply he gets and TK can feel himself shrinking back. 

“Oh, uh okay bud sorry. Well have a great day!” Travis tries to inject some enthusiasm back into his voice, just trying to get Nolan to hate him a little less. He thinks he succeeds a little when he gets a grunt back and a little nod. It’s an improvement he’ll take. 

Lawson shakes his head as they make it out the door. “Man, you got it bad.” He had just hung back through the conversation, watching in amusement as his best friend made a fool out of himself. 

TK just groans out “I know” in reply. He can’t help it though, there’s something about Nolan that makes TK need to know him, need to know every little thing that makes him laugh and makes him sad. He wants to be responsible for what seems like a not often brought out smile.

“Please don’t make us need to get a new coffee place dude. I like Essens.” Law pleads, too used to TK’s antics that either result in them banned or in them being the most beloved customers, with no middle ground existing. 

“It’s fine, I swear. He’s gunna love me you’ll see.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please let me know what you think! I haven't written anything in years, but this was just stuck in my head.


End file.
